Where'd you go?
by tvdhod
Summary: Sam and Dean Winchester left behind Chicago a long time ago. They drove away in the impala and never looked back. Now they've returned and everyone has to comes to terms with that. One brother has to face the fact that the city wasn't the only thing he left behind.
1. Chapter 1

It was just another night after a long day of work. Most of the team, including Jay, was at Molly's having a few drinks. They had all been surprised when he decided to tag along. Everyone had been sensing for the past few days that there was something going on with him and Erin. It's like they were civil around each other, but tense.

And yet here they all were, having some drinks and laughing at some story Ruzek was telling.

The door to the bar opened and no one in the group really paid any notice, until there was a tall figure hovering next to their table. Jay looked up and saw a man with long brown hair, who looked like he was around his mid thirties. He didn't recognize the man and was about to ask who he was but Kevin beat him to it.

"I'm sorry, have we met before? Is there something we can help you with?" Atwater asked, trying to sound polite.

Jay looked around at his team members to see if he could get some sort of hint as to who this guy was from any of them. Ruzek looked just as lost as Jay felt. Olinsky looked like he might have recognized him, but almost couldn't place why. Kevin asked the question so he obviously had no idea. What caught Jay's attention though, was the look he saw on Erin's face. She looked like she was in a confused daze. He could see her mouth hanging slightly open, as if she wanted to say something but couldn't find the right words.

The mystery man looked towards Erin and met her eyes.

"Hey," he spoke quietly.

Erin let out a small, almost disbelieving laugh, "hey," she replied in the same quiet voice.

He looked at Atwater, "Sorry to interrupt, I'm Sam. I know Erin, I heard that this is where I could find her and I wanted to see if I could borrow her for a second," he finished shifting his gaze back to Erin.

Jay looked towards Erin and saw that her entire body seemed to be in shock, but she was trying her best to hide it. She nodded towards Sam and slowly got off her stool.

"I'll be right back, guys sorry," she said as she led the man back out the door onto the sidewalk.

Erin shoved her hands in her pockets, not sure if they were shaking because of the man standing in front of her, or because of the chill from the wind. She figured it was probably a mix of both.

She met Sam's eyes again and couldn't believe what she was seeing. He was here, he was back, standing in front of her and she had so much to say but it felt like she couldn't remember how to form a single word.

Sam just watched her, waiting for her to make the first move. He didn't know how this was going to go over, so he walked into the situation prepared for almost anything. Yelling, hitting, crying, even hugging, but he got none of that.

Instead she just looked up at him and spoke softly, "I saw him the other day," she let out a slight bitter laugh, "he was here, watching me. I saw him, but I looked away for a second and then when I looked back he was gone. I thought I was going crazy," she shook her head.

"Yeah," he started, "we've been in town for a few days. That's actually why I'm here."

"What do you mean?" She asked still partially in a haze.

"I told him I thought it might be good to come check up on you, see how you were doing and all. He refused to and he hasn't been saying much of anything since we got here, " Erin could see the worry he had for his brother in his eyes, "I had no idea he had seen you."

Erin fidgeted and scratched her forehead quickly, "I'm sorry, but I don't really know what you want me to do. It sounds like he's made his decision. Maybe it's for the best."

"Come on Erin, you don't really think that. I think he's just scared. He's not prepared to have this conversation, so he figures he'll just avoid ever having to see you. That's not what's right and we all know it."

Erin sighed already feeling drained from this barely five minute conversation, "Listen, when Dean makes up his mind you and I both know there's no point in trying to change it. Now I'm glad you stopped by, really, and it was nice to see you, but I think that I should go back inside."

She moved towards the door and Sam looked like part of him wanted to stop her, but a bigger part knew that he couldn't. Her and his brother were a lot alike in that way. They were both stubborn as hell.

Back inside the bar Jay looked towards Olinsky with a look that meant 'tell me everything you know about this guy'.

Alvin just shrugged, "He looks a bit like someone Erin used to know, but I'm not sure if he's the same guy I'm thinking of."

The older man was never forthcoming with details.

"If you really want to know ask her yourself," Al nodded to the door which Erin was walking back in through. She was alone this time.

She walked over to the table to take her previous seat and was met with lots of questioning eyes. "Sorry about that, he just had a quick question," she shrugged it off. Jay wanted to pry more but he wasn't sure it was his place, he wasn't sure where they stood so he decided to drop it for now.

The team went back to having their normal conversation and eating. After about fifteen minutes Erin's drinks were gone and she hadn't touched her food since her visitor. She told the team that she was going to call it an early night and head home, grabbing her coat off the stool and heading for the door. Jay watched her walk out wondering what was going on.

When she got back to her apartment she threw her coat on the couch and went straight to lay in her bed.

She looked up at the ceiling trying to figure out what she was feeling. She had no idea what to do with the information she was just given. On one hand, she could just do what Dean was planning to do, avoid each other entirely. Or she could confront him, but what would she say? She had no idea. All she knew was that she was exhausted. Her head hurt from thinking about it and she just wanted to close her eyes to shut her brain up. She turned on her side and drifted off to sleep, the situation still at the forefront of her mind. She almost wanted to laugh at the irony. When she wants him to leave he just won't go away.

 ** _A/N Hey, so I just had the idea for this story and I'm not sure how I feel about it yet. Feel free to tell me what you think of it so far. Thanks for reading!_**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: So so so sorry I haven't updated this story in a while. I wasn't sure if I was going to continue it at first but I just got inspired to do it so I hope you enjoy!**

Erin work up with two things the next morning: a pounding headache and a bone to pick.

Who the hell did he think he was?

He shows up after all this time and he doesn't even have the respect, the _decency_ to come talk to her himself. Well she was sick of it, sick of him always making the decisions, sick of always being the last to know.

She was going to find him and they were going to talk, if nothing else than for her to tell him where he can go shove it.

Erin rolled out of bed, took an advil, and got into the shower ready for the day. After she was finished getting ready she headed to work, skipping her morning coffee. Her new found anger was acting enough like caffeine.

On her way to work she decided that she was going to find a way to contact Sam. If he didn't try to reach out again she'd just have to find him. She mentally kicked herself for not at least getting a phone number from him yesterday.

She also added apologizing to Sam on her to-do list. She was short with him yesterday, and rightfully so, but she still felt the need to tell him she was sorry. Her own shock and disbelief was clouding her judgement. Who could really blame her though?

As mad as she had been, it was still good to see him.

She pulled open the door of the station and walked in, giving a quick nod and hello to Platt, then made her way up the stairs.

When she came to the top she was met with her team's faces. Kevin looked up from his desk and gave a little wave to greet her. Ruzek came up from behind her and slung his arm across her shoulder.

"Hey Lindsay, how is it you call it an early night, but you wake up later than the rest of us?" Adam asks playfully.

"You do look like you lost a little beauty sleep Ruzek," she jokes back and walks to her desk.

She organizes a couple of papers she had left messily strewn on her desk yesterday and then looks up. Across from her she sees Jay staring at her. She wanted to say something but she didn't know what. She never knows what to say to him anymore.

"Hey," _that's safe enough_ she thought.

"Hey," he said back seemingly surprised she even said something to him.

The conversation didn't seem to be going much further and she wasn't going to stick around to find out.

That coffee was sounding more appealing right about now. She got up and made her way over to the break room. When she walked in she saw Al pouring himself a cup. She walked over to grab a mug and say good morning.

He gave her a good morning of his own and then turned to leave. As she was pouring her cup she heard him stop for a second and turn back around.

"The guy that came into the bar yesterday, was that who I think it was?" He asks her, catching her slightly off guard. She doesn't really know why she's surprised, of course he'd remember the guy. He may be older but he still looked like the same old Sam. Sometimes even she forgets that Al has been there for almost half of her life, forgets that he knows more about her than a lot of people.

"Yeah it was," she responds.

"Should we be worried?" He asks looking unsure if it was his place to ask.

"Not at all, he just wanted to stop by and say hi when he was in town," well it wasn't a _complete_ lie.

"Okay," he pauses, looking like he's debating on saying the next part, "Does Hank know?"

"No, I haven't mentioned it to him, but I don't think he needs to be concerned with it. Just two old friends saying hey," it's not that Erin didn't want to tell Voight, she just didn't see the need to.

"Okay then," the older man said, "I'd add some sugar to the coffee, it's a little burnt".

Erin was thankful for the change in subject and smiled in return.

"Thanks," she said back, "for the concern and for the advice".

"Anytime," he nodded and then left the room.

She had always admired the man. He reminded her of Hank in a lot of ways but was also so different. He was more calm, more patient at times.

Erin added a couple packets of sugar to her cup and then walked back out to her desk.

The day went on like usual, they got a case and each of their assignments. She hadn't gotten any 'we need to talk' looks from Voight, which she figured meant Al hadn't said anything to him about last night. She realized that she never specifically asked him not to say anything, but was thankful that he hadn't.

A question filled Voight was the last thing she needed to add to her plate.

On their way back from questioning a pawn shop owner, Erin was driving with Jay in the passengers seat. She was going over the details of the case in her head when a voice interrupted her thoughts.

"So who was that at the bar last night?"

She glances over to see Jay's questioning eyes on her. His voice sounded casual but his eyes showed there was something more. It looked like the question had been bothering him all day. She had been so distracted with everything she must have not realized.

"Just an old friend," she said trying to keep the same casual tone.

"What did he want?"

His question seemed a little prying to her but she answered anyways, "He just wanted to stop by and let me know he was in town. He moved away a couple of years ago," she explained.

Erin saw Jay nod out of the corner of her eye. He was quiet for a moment and she had almost thought that was going to be the end of the conversation, but then he spoke up again.

"Are you in some kind of trouble Erin?" His voice was less casual this time.

 _Well that was direct._

"No," she let out a small laugh.

"Because I know we're in a weird place right now, but you can always tell me," he says quickly.

'A weird place' hmm, yeah I guess that's one way to describe it.

She thought about saying this out loud but decided against it. She didn't want to fight with him. She had enough on her mind already.

They arrive back at the station and she puts the car in park. Before getting out she turns to Jay.

"Thank you for that, but I promise, there's no trouble." She tries to assure him.

He looks hesitant for a second but then nods, "Okay," he says letting out a puff of air.

"Okay," she repeats.

They get out of the car and head back up to their desks.

The team shares their information with each other for the case until eventually Hank calls it a night. As they're leaving Jay comes up next to her.

"I think the team is going to stop by Molly's for a little, are you coming?"

"Um not tonight," she answers,"think I might just head home, I'm pretty tired."

"Yeah, okay maybe next time then," he offered.

"Yeah definitely," she said.

Jay felt like there was something off about her but he didn't know if it was because of what was going on with them, or if it was something else.

"Well have a nice night," he said to her.

"You too, have fun," she replied back and gave a slight wave goodbye.

When she got home she started her research.

She knew motels were a good start. But the city was full of them and she had no idea how to narrow it down. She figured she could try to find the brothers by name, but it was unlikely that would be any easier.

She wished she had gotten more information from Sam. Why they're here, where they're staying, how long they're staying.

She wasn't so sure if she wanted to know the answer to that last one.

 **A/N: So there it is I hope you liked it, let me know! (Also I was thinking of making Sam and Dean bounty hunters instead of hunters but I'm not sure yet)**


End file.
